Friday, February 7th 2014.

Drove the car in to town today to fetch Benjamin from the station. He is staying over for the weekend as he has business in the area. I am keen to learn news of his mother but he says he hasn’t seen her recently as he’s been so busy, however he is going to visit her on his way home. I ask him to send her my warm regards.

We stop off at the Arms for lunch which he refused to let me pay for. The steak was overcooked and I told the barman so. He explained that the chef was new and apologised on his behalf but did not proffer any sort of compensation which I told him wasn’t cricket. Benjamin intervened on my behalf and said he wouldn’t pay for something he didn’t order to which the barman replied that if that was the case then why had I eaten it. Told the fraud in no uncertain terms that we wouldn’t be returning and what’s more he could discount the custom of the gardeners club members with immediate effect. Hell bath no fury like a man diddled! Benjamin laughed all the way home.

Thursday, February 6th 2014

The country is in recovery!

Have started receiving cards through the post from local estate agents keen to evaluate and sell my property to the alleged hoardes of house buyers baying at the village gates. A house two doors down sold as soon it was put up for sale and a lot of people are quite suddenly having their driveways done.

Called the council about the pothole outside number twelve. Got through to a lady who took down the details to pass on to the County Council Pothole Rapid Response Unit for investigation, which sounds promising.

Snooker night tonight!

Wednesday, February 5th 2014.

I noticed Julia beyond the rose bush. I wished her good morning over the fence to which she replied in kind.

“Potty bloody weather isn’t it? Storms one day, sunny the next.”

“I know mate” she said, “as long as it doesn’t snow I’m happy as Larry. I hate the bloody snow.”.

“Me too, bloody stuff.” I said shaking my head. “bloody stuff.”.

“You kidding me there Chas?” She said popping her head over the fence, “I saw you out there last Christmas making a snowman. Brilliant it was, I was well impressed. Who knew that you’d be Mr super fuckin’ snowman maker?”.